


I’ve Turned Into a Monster

by ReyAndor19



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Dark Rey (Star Wars), F/M, Light Ben, Mustafar (Star Wars)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:42:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22246516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReyAndor19/pseuds/ReyAndor19
Summary: “If I told you what I was,Would you turn your back on me?And if I seemed dangerous,Would you be scared?”Monster, by Imagine Dragons.Rey saved Ben from the dark side by becoming a Sith. Now Ben, a Jedi, has to to bring Rey back to the light, while she tries to turn him to the dark side.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo
Comments: 5
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something because dark!Rey+light!Ben=perfection. The idea sort of came out of nowhere, so hopefully it isn’t too confusing.

“Forget it Kylo”. I’m the villain. The monster.” Kyra and Ben stood across from each other on a platform. Mustafar’s famous lava rivers flowed beneath them, the glow reminding her that one false step could be her last.

“You weren’t always. I knew you before that. Remember our training at the Jedi academy? You were strong with the light side of the force, Rey.”

“My name isn’t Rey,” she corrected, anger finding its way into her voice. “I told you. It’s Kyra.”

“I don’t care. To me you’re always Rey. The light side I know is in there somewhere. You’ve just hidden her away.”

“The light sider you  _knew_ ,  Kylo.”  
”My name is Ben.”

“Then we’re tied.”

“Fine, you’re Kyra then. But I’m a light sider now. And I know you are too.”

“Then you’re wrong. Rey is gone. She was weak, and powerless. Not anymore.”

”Rey was never weak,” he protested angrily.  _Good_ , the voice in her mind whispered eagerly.  _If he’s angry, he’s more likely to draw from the dark side of the force._ It was what she wanted, wasn’t it? Kylo sensed her doubt. “Rey, Kyra, I don’t care what you’re calling yourself now. But answer this: do you truly want to fight with the dark side of the force, or is it just what your master wants you to think?”

The familiar light side of herself caught his words and desperately tried to hold on, but she pushed it away. _Of course you want to fight with the dark side_ , the voice in her head told her. But did she really?

“I...I...” She stammered, unable to form her response. The light and dark fought like two young children might fight over a toy, both pulling at her. Any more, and her soul would split into two halves. Finally the answer surfaced. The one she had hidden away at the academy because of Luke’s strict rules about relationships, and later when she and Kylo- no, Ben- were on opposite sides of the war. “I don’t want to fight anymore. I just want to be with you. The two of us, together. Ben, I love you, but I can’t.”

“Why not?” He asked her. “Rey, I love you too. And we don’t need to fit inside the boundaries of light and dark. It can be something new. A...” He struggled for the right word.

“A balance,” she finished for him. 

“A balance,” he echoed. 

“But we can’t,” she said. She was Kyra Ren, and he was Ben Solo. They were enemies. “It sounds perfect, but it can never happen. I’m a monster. You should be scared of me. You’re the hero. It’s your job to end my life. You can weave fairy tales all you want, but that’s all they are. I’m sorry.” She turned and ran.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I guess this is going to be continued then...

“Rey!” Ben called, sprinting after her. “Kyra! Wait! Come back!”  
She ignored him and kept running across the platform, wind blowing her hair all over.  
“I can’t believe I’m doing this...” he muttered before reaching out to the force. Rey was instantly frozen in a standing position.  
“Let me go,” she demanded, her eyes burning with anger.  
“You may have been the first to master mind tricks, but I’ll always beat you at force freezing,” he said with a casual grin, as if they were kids again. Best friends, discussing lessons, or ships, or anything they could think of to talk about. As if nothing had changed. _But it has. You run away from me when I come near, and I push you away when you reach out._ He hated to admit it, but she was right. Their lives weren’t some fairy tale. Rey’s parents had died when she was young. His parents never had time to take care of him. Both had turned to the dark side. Both had nearly died multiple times trying to rescue each other from the dark side. Darkness and hate plagued their love for each other.  
“Look, let’s just talk,” he pleaded. She sighed.  
“Ben, you know we can’t.” He was reminded of a much younger version of her, as a light sider. They had been on a spying mission, and he had wanted to confront their enemies right then. Her voice had been the same then. She wanted to attack too, but she knew they couldn’t.  
“Please. You’re not alone.” It was a familiar line between the two of them, almost a way of greeting.  
“Am I?” She asked, her eyes fiery again. “Are you? Because it seems to me that we were never there when the other truly needed it.”  
Ben knew she was just trying to play his weaknesses, call to the darkness inside of him, but her sentence rang true.  
“We can’t fix the past, Rey,” he said, ignoring her glare, “but we can make the future better.”  
He met her gaze steadily, like the winner could be determined by who wouldn’t blink. As if it were a child’s game, and not a matter of life and death. Her eyes burned with fire and tears, as they both came undone, the pain they had both hidden coming out to play.  
“Remember our bond?” Rey asked, almost tentatively.  
“Yeah?”  
“It’s gone,” she said, her voice low. “I’ve tried to reach out to you. I know you’ve done the same. Our destinies aren’t connected anymore. Accept it already. There’s no way that this will end with both of us together.”  
They stood across from each other, both waiting for the other to give in.


	3. Chapter 3

“Look Ben, I don’t know what you’re trying to do here, but it won’t work,” she said, trying to sound confident. 

“I’m not doing anything,” he replied evenly. “You could even run away now if you wanted to.”

“You know that’s not what I mean.” The light side of herself begged to be free, trying to get past the walls Kyra had put up long ago. 

“I do.”

“I’m being torn apart,” she admitted, just as he had so long ago. 

“People can change, Kyra. Just like lightsabers,” he added. She reached for hers, unsure. He took hold of the other end, but made no move to take it for himself. 

“Remember? It wasn’t always red.”

“I-I’m not a Jedi anymore.”

“Nor are you a Sith.” Ben’s words rang true. But so did hers. Now they were locked in a new kind of battle, each grasping one end of her saber. Neither attempted to wrest the hilt away, but they fought all the same. And Kyra knew there was only one way to end it.

**************************************************

Ben heard the saber ignite, and waited for the pain, the realization of death, the feeling of fading into the force he had heard described in his uncle’s ancient Jedi teachings. It never came. When he opened his eyes, the saber’s blade was turned to face Rey. “I’m sorry,” she said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed, even though this didn’t really have the happiest of endings...


End file.
